Not to be counted on

If it's snowing, I will skip the big football game.
If it's too late, I'll abandon concert plans.
If there's too much smoke, I'll leave the show early.
If I'm tired, ornery or feeling lazy, I'll turn down an invitation to hang out with friends.
And if I have to stand in line longer than 10 minutes to vote, I can't be bothered.

Thousands of people with a lot more dedicated to democracy have waited an average of one hour - often more like three - to vote early in Charlotte over the last two weeks. I haven't yet, because I won't stand in line. And if there's one on Tuesday, the next President will have to do it without me. How's that for inspiring?

Parents, don't let your children grow up to impatient and cynical like me.

Cold and Empty Promises

It's weird that the tomorrow morning will arrive in Charlotte with an icy kiss of 29 degrees, while Utah's sunrise will be a balmy 47 degrees.

They said "People move here for the great climate." "You can golf year round." "You can't beat the weather in Charlotte."

What about Hawaii? Or SoCal? Or Utah, for that matter.

I moved here, in part, to get away from freezing winters. And here I am breaking out the ski parka on Halloween.

Grrrrr. Or make that, brrrrrrr.

Heavy drinking

This is how I'm keeping the Fall chill at bay.
The chamomile apple is delicious and there's a cherry cinnamon flavor that rocks. The best part is these are really tasty herbal teas that you can buy at the regular grocery store. Normally it takes a trip to the fancy market and a much bigger hit to the pocketbook.

The downside is I like my tea scalding - which does not pair well with my impatient nature. I wonder how long it takes burnt taste buds to regenerate?

Boo!

Halloween doesn't really do much for me, but I love autumn. I went to a pumpkin carving party tonight - mine was the tiniest, as you can see. And probably the least creative. But I think it's cute. The treats at the party were fun, too. I brought chips and salsa (boring, I know). The hostess went all out. These are deviled eggs and olives!

Once Again, In Over My Head

Hanging wallpaper is not for the faint . . . and I'm in serious need of smelling salts. It took me TWO HOURS to put up that very, very small amount of wallpaper you see below. The stuff between the counter and the cabinets. It's great paper - mom helped me pick it out. And you wouldn't think it would be that complicated to put it up there - just wet it and unroll, it right.

Sheesh. I messed up so many times that I didn't have enough left to hang above the cabinets. I don't think I would have even tried, frankly. I went with paint instead, but of course, I think I went too dark. So now I'm hatching a plan to add some gold pinstripes to lighten it up and tie into the wallpaper below.

Turned into an all-day affair and it's still a work in progress. Hopefully I'll be semi-satisfied when it's all said and done.

Sail Away With Me

I'm daydreaming about this thing called Cayamo. It's a music cruise through the Caribbean with performances all day and night. The lineup is pretty nice - mellow folksy stuff. But LYLE LOVETT is going to be on this cruise. He'll be captive! That's seven days in which I might possibly bump into him sipping soda on the pool deck or ordering off the deli menu or gorging at the midnight buffet. Cruises don't really float my boat, in general. The one I've been on was fine - mostly about the food, of which there are inordinate amounts on these cruises. Aside from a weight-gain device, I find them an otherwise pretty boring way to see the world.

But this Cayamo thing. . . this wouldn't be about seeing the world. It'd be about hearing good music and spending seven days trying to bump into Lyle Lovett on his pony on a boat.

Fire in Aisle 16

When I saw the big red fire engine in front of the supermarket tonight, I figured some old lady had passed out with low blood sugar or a rambunctious kid cracked his head open on a corner of the meat counter.

It wasn't anything that dramatic at all. Unless you count five firemen all big and burly in their matching t-shirts and yellow fireman pants, suspenders swishing loosely around their hips dramatic.

I call it distracting.

There should be rules against entire trucks of handsome firefighters taking field trips to the local grocery store. My quick trip for a couple of forgotten items doubled in length with all the extra laps I was compelled to take around the produce aisle, smiling nonchalantly and trying not to stare. One of them did make eye contact and say hello. I looked away really fast and mumbled something back. Ugh. I might well have been back in high school, taking the long way to class just so I could pass in front of a cute boy's locker.

Someone told me once that firemen eat really well at the firehouse because they have nothing to do when they're on call except cook big meals and wait for something to go up in flames.

I suppose I'm happy they didn't have some poor victim's house to douse today. But really, couldn't they have sent just one distracting guy into the store? Preferably one wearing a wedding ring?

And after all my stalking, I didn't even get a glimpse at the food in their cart. Steak and potatoes, I'm guessing. I know they didn't buy much though - couldn't have been enough for more than one meal. Which means they'll probably be back at my grocery store tomorrow.

I'll be sure to comb my hair before I go.